hindsight is 20/20
revisiting the past 25 years of my life is humbling...but insightful
Last month I turned 25, and naturally I thought, of course, I need to do the somewhat cliche but introspective lessons I’ve learned in my quarter century of life – a right of passage for birthdays. With my frontal lobe developed (sorta), these lessons serve as reminders for me to look back on where I was, cement where I am right now, and chart the path for where I’m aiming to go. Some of these may be common sayings that didn’t hit as hard until I went through them myself, some are lessons learned the hard way, and some are just random thoughts circulated and now reimagined in a digital space.
A quote I enjoy goes, “What if there’s no wrong answer? Things are never all or nothing. Either way you go, you end up great or not, or somewhere in the middle.”
I imagine that navigating your twenty-somethings shares a lot of parallels with these statements. You don’t always know where you’re going, or how things will turn out, but you have to trust yourself and hope that you’ll end up where you’re supposed to be. So as I reflected on my lessons, wondering if I was remembering and sharing the “right” things that have impacted me, I pointed out to myself that there is no wrong answer and these are just little reminders that keep me honest.
Enjoy! <3
You have free will…literally. Do what YOU wanna do!
Always ask for what you want and know you deserve. Whether it’s that job, friendships, relationships.. the worst they can say is no.
Never let a job drain your mental health. The workplace, while not always maybe your go-to safe place, should still be a place of learning, growth and pouring into your skills and dreams. Once it stops doing that, it may be time to move on.
It's okay for your passions to change and feel like you’re putting to death a part of yourself. That’s still growth and shedding this layer doesn’t make you any less you.
Romanticize your life down to the little things. The way your room looks in the sunlight, the yummy looking matcha you made, the cozy bedtime routine.
Do not be afraid to crash out (reasonably)!! Showing your emotions does not have to be a weakness and you’re entitled to a reaction if you feel the need to do so. But still be mindful of any unintended consequences.
9/10 your soulmate isn’t calling you from a blocked number – there’s a reason they’re blocked.
Get therapy (and all your doctor’s appointments) while you’re still on your parents’ insurance.
So many things in life are mind over matter. I know we say this so often but truly once you get past the mental barriers, you can do so many things you thought you would never do.
Never regret telling someone how you felt/ how they made you feel. Will you have a myriad of emotions about it? Probably. But more often than not you may regret holding your tongue more.
It’s okay to be exhausted. You can’t take care of others when you’re not taking care of yourself. Take that mental health day, book a self-care experience, and prioritize yourself sometimes.
Healthy girl tip: try to get outside at least once a day, even if just to walk around the corner.
You do not always have to be the bigger person. Sometimes it’s okay to be selfish and choose what you want over putting other people’s feelings and emotions first.
Complaining is human, but be grateful for what you have and where you are. You’re living in answered prayers. Remember that!
Unfortunately you can not drink how you used to in college. Pedialyte + liquid IV are your besties.
Travel while you can with no responsibilities, kids or otherwise. Make that bucket list, save some money and see the world.
Say no more often. You do not need to be a yes man to everything.
It’s okay to stay in for a weekend. Give the streets a rest every now and then; I promise they’ll still be there <3
Make time for your passions because it only gets harder as you get older, so carve out that space when you can.
I saw a video recently that said sometimes a closed door has nothing behind it. Don’t let your ego get in the way of you walking away and on to better things.
Spend less time worrying about what could have been or “should” have been, and stay present in what is. It’s hard to let things go but truly the things that are meant to work out for you won’t miss you.
Please please please make a budget. Yes money will come back yada yada but think about how sick you finna be for those couple weeks you don’t have it.
Finding a community isn’t always easy or immediate, but remember to be thankful for the village you have. We take for granted the people we have supporting us sometimes and that love isn’t always guaranteed
Disappointment is a part of life. Roll with the punches, charge it to the game, and find things that make you happy in spite of it.
Sometimes there’s no right or wrong answer. Trust yourself and do what you think is best.